Why Your Teen Automatically Thinks the Worst

Why do kids immediately think the worst about a situation or another child's or teen's actions?

Kids and teens often jump to the worst case scenario when their minds run a little anxious. It’s a self-preservation technique on overdrive. Their anxious mind assumes “so and so pushed me on purpose,” or “those kids laughing in class must be laughing at me,” which leads to a fight, flight, or freeze response.

What are some specific ways parents can help guide their children/teens into thinking the best, not the worst, of others?

I always coach the kids I work with to take a pause and step back from the situation. They could be right - this person could have knocked into them on purpose.

But what else could be true?

Could it have been an accident? And if it was an accident, how would that change their feelings and their actions? Breaking down this cognitive triangle (thoughts, feelings, behaviors) can be so impactful for kids and teens, and it gives them more control over their reactions.