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Category Archives: Interpersonal Effectiveness


Conflict (or disagreement) happens in relationships of all kinds – between romantic partners, a teen or adult child and parent, siblings, friends, business partners, supervisor and subordinate or co-workers.  One person’s wants, needs or preferences differ from someone else’s in Read more…


Talking about mom is a frequent topic of conversation among friends, between clients and their therapists and with other family members (at your own peril).  With notable exceptions, relationships between adult children and their mothers are complicated.  Take my situation Read more…


Nobody makes you fly off the handle or shutdown when you feel rising anger.  You have an urge, you make a choice and you act on it.  All of this can happen in a split second. The question is when Read more…


Are you married to someone who has borderline personality disorder?  Or maybe you have a child who has BPD? Living with a loved one with BPD can wear on you so much your nerves get frayed and your temper flares, Read more…


Sometimes it’s easiest to understand what a skill is when we know what it is not.  Validation is one of those skills. When I think of invalidation, there’s a scene in the Robert Altman movie, Prairie Home Companion that sticks in Read more…


The lady doth protest too much, methinks is a quotation from the 1599 play Hamlet by William Shakespeare.  Over the centuries, it has come to describe an individual’s frequent and vehement attempts to convince others of their version of events Read more…


A mighty oak will not fall in one swing of the ax; a formidable foe will not fall after a single punch; a powerful army will not raise the white flag after one shot fired; and a chess master will Read more…


Mary and her husband, John, have the same predictable fight week after week. John cheated on Mary five years ago and she can’t let it go.  When John is late getting home from work, which happens frequently, she obsesses he’s Read more…

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