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Resolutions, goals, intentions – whatever you call them – it’s that time of year when some of us try again.  A University of Scranton psychologist reports almost half of Americans write resolutions most years.  Some achieve lasting change; many don’t. Read more…


In my last blog, I talked about what gets in the way of self-compassion and shared a link to test how self-compassionate you are.  Since then, I have done more reading and thinking about how to cultivate self-compassion and the Read more…


Most of us are fairly good at living by the Golden Rule, “Do unto others as you would have them do unto you,” at least as it relates to those closest to us. Ironically, most of us are not so good at showing Read more…


There’s lots of talk about resilience these days and just as many questions about what it is, the characteristics of resilient individuals and whether and to what extent it can be learned. The experience of “stressful” or “traumatic” events doesn’t Read more…


Stopping to check the facts in the heat of the moment takes intentional and practiced effort. The more emotionally aroused we become, the more likely we over-interpret or misinterpret the facts of the situation.  When we do this, we run Read more…


Are you married to someone who has borderline personality disorder?  Or maybe you have a child who has BPD? Living with a loved one with BPD can wear on you so much your nerves get frayed and your temper flares, Read more…


Sometimes it’s easiest to understand what a skill is when we know what it is not.  Validation is one of those skills. When I think of invalidation, there’s a scene in the Robert Altman movie, Prairie Home Companion that sticks in Read more…


We humans have an innate desire to avoid emotional pain. After all, who wants to feel pain? Ironically, however, the more we try to avoid emotional pain, the more painful the situation becomes. Stated more simply, avoiding pain leads to Read more…


The lady doth protest too much, methinks is a quotation from the 1599 play Hamlet by William Shakespeare.  Over the centuries, it has come to describe an individual’s frequent and vehement attempts to convince others of their version of events Read more…


Battle lines are drawn in her head each side ready to attack the other at a moment’s notice. On one side, her inner critic waits not-so-patiently to judge. Her inner critic judges harshly when she ridicules her best friend or Read more…

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